Tuesday, 27 May 2008

Amaving Story

Due to foreign tantrums the following transcript has been edited at Mavie's request.

Apart from a one sentence email saying something along the lines of "I made it, being a Man Wolf is
exhausting," this is the first real contact I've had with Mavie since he bailed off to Hungary.

This is unusually brief for a Mavie story but he's packed a lot into it including all the necessary Mavie
story ingredients such as,
  • Lost skateboard
  • Broken machinery
  • Stupid American
  • Water
  • Booze
  • Talking himself out of a bad situation
  • Getting free stuff from stangers
  • Motorcycle adventure
  • Watching a sunrise
  • Nude dudes
Somehow he managed to not mention having a hang over or vomitting at all. This fact, combined with the brief, succinct nature af the story makes me think he has hired a ghost writer.

I should mention that he is lurking around with some dudes who are making a film, I guess his role on set is to not be a pain in the arse and to be a member of the motorcycle gang "The Manwolves" when required. This was his response to my tale of woe regarding me being broke and having a flat tyre on my motorbike.

Last time I got a flat on my XT I was on a dirt road in Costa Rica we'd just jumped
the border and were illegal immigrants...I jacked up my bike with a huge rock (if I
were you I'd use a milk crate) I used plenty of shampoo and a couple of wrenches,
and tyre irons..Tom came back with a patch kit and a random yank in a 4WD showed up
with an electric pump that plugged into the cigarette lighter of his car. Back on the
road in less than an hour. You are extremely lucky that it was probably your back
tyre and you didn't crash. Not to mention you were probably in Melb where you have
everything you need. Its almost the same as changing a flat on a bicycle. Except on
a larger scale. Soap is essential, and check your tyre thouroughly for nails etc.
Maybe drink a beer and get stoked...

This film has been a whirlwind of flat tyres....everyday something completely fucked
happens. The wheels fell off the old German Trubaunt car that is being used in the
film on its way to Slovenia... the producer put petrol in a desiel run van... At one
point the Hungarian half of the crew threaten to walk out...Alex flew over the handle
bars of his tredly, my skate got swallowed by the Danube, Glenn got his face sucked
by the producers lunatic lesbian wife...Jared and Stephen accidently went to the
wrong hotsprings, which turned out to be a gay beat...hand jobs in the steam room??
The lead actor on the other hand is an 18 yr old kid from Cali who knows about
skateboarding and smokig pot..oh and asked me if Australia was close to Barcelona??
err....he was home schooled.
Did I mention that Alex managed to cast Brian Blessed to
play a main role. By far the biggest actor in the film so the entire shoot has been
scheduled around his availabilty...Google him or ask Dave Snow if you're not
familiar. So he fly's in yesterday from London to shoot for two weeks...has a fucking
heart attack on the plane....do I need to continue?

Apart from all this nonsense I did manage to escape for a while on that Suzuki Bandit.
After spending two full nights working as a manwolf in the depths of the largest most
stunningly beuatiful cave system in the world... I rode through the hills and checked
out some more caves recommended by a local champion that gave me a free pass...one
particluar chamber was 147m tall with a raging river running through it that had 26
different waterfalls and a sketchy suspended bridge in the middle. I rode down to the
Slovenia coast to meet up with the mob. Ridiculuosly beuatiful town with Italy to the
right and Croatia to the left. The view was only spoiled by Bollands naked body
prancing around the Square. We swam in the Adriatic while the sun set. Not a bad
evening indeed.

The next day I rode up to Lake Bled, surrounded by Alps, with two castles on an
island in the middle. I was the only one dare swim in its chilly waters. Realising I
was close to the Austrian border.. I figured why not. Off through the Alps I went.
Not aware it was a public holiday I couldn't find a bite to eat anywhere...then the
Austrian Police pulled me over and asked me to show them my first aid kit, which is
apparently compulsary to carry in all vehicles. Thank God I found one under the seat
and talked my way out of a speeding ticket. As I crossed back into Slovenia I came
across a motorcycle gang clubhouse. Situated on the banks of a river with hammocks,
picnic tables a pier and a neon lit cycle pearched on the roof. They called
themselves the "Heavens Devils" They played ACDC, gave me food, beer and a patch and
asked me to stay the night. Sketchy naked photos of whores lined the inside walls and
apparently you could get a hooker half a k up the road for 16 Euro....I ate mushroom
soup, drank a beer and got the hell outta there. I crossed into Croatia and watched
the sun set behind a gas station. 280 km of cold night riding at 140kph through
Hungary and I was home...back in Budapest. One day...four countries?? Rare treat, but
definately not my pace. I'm looking at buying an East German 250 two stroke for the
next chapter. I've seen more sun rises in this country than anywhere else. Night
shooting, all night bathing, strange nocturnal life style.
Hope alls well. Keep punchin. Say hi to all...

1 comment:

Too much bravado said...

Is tire the same thing as tyre?
Fuck, I miss Mavie.